Asking for help is something I have hated doing. It can feel like an admission of defeat. Fiercely independent and determined are more my nature.
When I asked my house church family for help (click here to read the story), it was very difficult. When they showed up and gave me much more than I asked for, it was surprising and wonderful. Yet, I felt embarrassed. I am not good at asking for help, and am even worse at accepting it! Sitting in my living room studying for a test, while they were just outside my front window, cleaning my yard for spring was uncomfortable for me. Very much needing the help, I had prayed for the ability to accept it gracefully. Wanting to thank them, I had purchased some warm cookies on the way home from work and kept them warm to give them.
As I prayed about becoming comfortable with accepting the help I had already received and was still uncomfortable with, I began to realize this was really as God meant life to be. Who of us can do life completely alone? It just is not realistic. We were never meant to live life alone, but many of us are alone for various reasons. While God stated, “It is not good for the man to be alone,” (Genesis 2:18 NIV) in reference to His making Eve for Adam, I believe we are not intended to be alone or to live life alone in more ways than marriage.
There are many things in life which are impossible to do alone. Sometimes we can hire help, but most of us really do need to rely on family and friends for help in many times of need. We cannot have all skills needed for every eventuality. Nor do most of us have the time to do everything which must be done.
Slowly I came to realize this is actually how God intended it. He wants us to be there for each other for more than just a couple hours a week at church. He wants us to be in each others lives. How else can we pick each other up when we fall? How will we even know when someone needs picked up? How else can we really learn from one another?
Yes, I now believe we are meant to be together and not live life alone on an island. He did not intend us to be alone. God created us for community. We not only need community for our spiritual growth and sustenance, but also simply for life. I am so grateful to not have to live life alone anymore.